Saturday, January 3, 2015

Saying Goodbye

As we ushered in a new year and said goodbye to 2014, I thought about the last year and everything it brought us.
It brought us happiness in the form of a new healthy baby girl.
It brought us a lot of fun and family memories.
It brought us big decisions about homeschooling.
It also brought sadness. The sadness came at the very end, however.

Life is so unpredictable. When you make careful plans, typically what you were planning for doesn't or won't happen. Yet, when you are least expecting it (and thus are typically unprepared), life has a way of sneaking up on a giant jack-in-the-box just waiting to spring out.

Change can be good, but with it also comes a period of adjustment and sadness from saying goodbye to the way things were. In our case, it also involves saying goodbye to a person who became like a grandfather to my children and like a father-figure to my husband.

For the past 14 years my husband has been a caregiver for one person. I often joked that he spent more time at work then at home! Work and home time was muddled, as he often thought about the person he cared for even when he was at home. It was more then a job, it was like caring for a family member.

We knew, of course, that the day would come in which that person passed on. It happens to all of us eventually... We carefully planned what-if scenarios and budgets so that we'd be ready, because it can be scary thinking of supporting a large family while starting over again with your job or career.  Yet, no one can really plan for death, Can they?

Sadly, over Christmas the man my husband cared for became sick rather unexpectedly and passed away.

My 12 year old son, Brayden, was quite attached to this man. Brayden was his favorite of all our kids (but shhhh don't tell the others...).  We think it's because Brayden has ADHD and is often in trouble at school and at home, and the man my husband cared for felt the strong need to reach out to him and make him feel special.   Brayden took his passing very hard. He was sad and depressed for several days. He still has his moments of sadness.  Watching your child grieve is hard for a parent to do, although I know its another one of those necessary lessons of life.

So that brings us to 2015...big changes. The reality of it all is that we have to figure out a new path in life now, a new career, and income to support our large family. I have no idea what to expect in 2015, but I hope it brings us some good changes and lots of happiness!

No comments: